My attitude

I was listening to Allen Hood teaching on the Family, and he talked about praying from a position of trust, and not of fear. I was convicted. I have been a constant state of fear, anger, and anxiety. This is not the heart of God. He has already promised to take care of us, why can't I trust that? I waste so much time living in regret over the past, and anxiously looking towards the future.
God, help us to live here,now, trusting and resting in you.

Waiting on the Lord

When you are in a place where you don't want to be, and you desperately want God to move on your behalf,  it is hard to wait for him to move. But wait we must. We must wait,  but we cannot be idle. We should prepare for the breakthrough, whenever and however it arrives. If it arrives tomorrow, we must be ready. If it arrives in ten years we must be ready. When Caleb wanted to enter into his land,  no one wanted to. Forty years later,  he went to Joshua and told him that he was ready to take his land. He wasn't bitter,  he was living in a state of readyness.

Desperate

I am put of options, out of ideas. God, if you're going to do anything in my life, please do it soon.

Standing alone

The problem with this journey is that I keep finding myself alone. I don't try to be alone, but the more I focus on God, and on who he is training me to become, I look up and find that I'm alone. I have friends, even Christian friends, but my life is disjointed, different people in different spheres. My brother in law that I prayed with till eleven at night and the young man I am meeting at three am the next day to hear what God is doing with him do not know about each other. My teachers, my boss,  do not know exactly all that I do, nor do most people care. I know no one who lives as I live. I identify with no one, and in that I am alone.